Children are unique. In order to explain, describe and identify the differences between children, psychologists use the concept of personality and behavior. Personality has been defined as the 'total pattern of characteristic ways of thinking, feeling and behaving that constitute the individual's distinctive method of relating to the environment'. Behavior patterns depict the mental and physical conditions of a child, which are extremely important because they not only explain the needs of children but also point out the flaws in their upbringing.
Practically, we have observed different behavior patterns of children, which are exposed to different environment. The variables of environment include the domestic home environment, the school environment and the social environment. In the home, children spend much of their time with their parents and it is here that they learn the most. The typical interaction pattern of the parents with their children leads to certain types of behaviors, which the children exhibit. Psychologists agree that children facing hostility will fight, children facing ridicule will be shy, children facing tolerance will feel guilty, children facing criticism will condemn, children facing encouragement will learn confidence, children facing praise will appreciate, children facing fairness will learn justice, children facing security will have faith and children facing acceptance and friendship will learn to find love in the world.
Some of the behavior that commonly occurs in children includes anti-social behavior. A child that says 'no' all of the time, or just ignores you is angry about something. Bullying can again be one of the manifestations of changed behavior. Sometimes an older toddler will appear to find their newly born sibling odious and will not even acknowledge their existence.
Above mentioned are just few of many patterns depicting a child's psyche. Now what are the circumstances behind them need to be understood.
Children are the most desperate recipients of love and they want everybody to love them. This sounds simple enough but many of the children who are in need of love the most are the ones who get it the least. It is quite often the case that the child who is intelligent and sharp is given much attention than the child who is not that good in academics. Children must be appreciated and recognized not for what they do but because of what they are. Children must be encouraged and acknowledged as this is a source of empowerment for children.
Another important thing, which the children demand, is the freedom of choice. This may sound a little absurd but actually it is very true in its sense. They should be allowed to choose, of course in their limits. Giving the right to choose means giving a responsibility that is followed by accountability.
Making for the need of children to have fun is quite an easy task because most children know intrinsically how to have fun. Parents should cherish not to quell this need but help their children build up their personalities and an acceptable behavior. How we practice giving care is critical to give effective guidance. This includes meeting all the needs of children by planning appropriate programs and activities with the children to ensure that they progress with strong personalities.
